Great discussion ladies! I would just like to thank Molly for bringing up the subject and for being so honest in this post.

First, I agree that we certainly need to support each other as women and not judge other women whose choices may not reflect ours.

Suzanne, when you say “Sometimes life is a lot easier and happy if you do not have to make any choices at all” I think you’re onto something that may prove to be a factor in why the happiness of women is declining. I mean, women 40 years ago did not have the same choices to make as we do today. Men used to make a lot of choices for women. The Maria Shriver study that is going to be discussed in news programs next week shows that women now make up more than 50% of the work force. Women are also the majority of graduates at colleges now. A HUGE shift is happening that will continue for the next several years. The study shows that women now hold more power than ever.

It will be interesting to see if the happiness of women will continue to decline as women become a more powerful force. Can we not handle the power and the choices? As more studies are conducted it will be interesting to see what results are produced.

WOW this was a great article and very true for me!

Thank you for your comments, Lydia and Suzanne.

Lydia – You remind me of me three years ago! I, too, wanted to wait until just the “right” time to have kids – until my business was successful enough to sustain itself while I devoted some of my attention to my new baby. Yet even as business success came, the “right” time to have babies never did. Instead, knowing that we wanted children, that it was the right decision for us, if not the perfect time, hubby and I jumped in with both feet. For me, at least, “balance” is the pot at the end of a never-ending rainbow.

Suzanne – I absolutely agree that women can be our own biggest critics ¬– and worst enemies, unfortunately. It’s too bad because we really ought to be supporting each other, however different our goals and life pursuits. I have to say, though, that for me personally, the immense pressure I feel to succeed in business (and run a household, and be a good mom and wife) comes from one place: me. . .
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I like it that you bring up this topic. I wrote a similar article last year. I’m not that surprised that women are less happy. First of all the pressure on women is very high. It is hard to combine family life with a job, let alone handle family life OR a job properly. But I think most of the pressure comes from other women. You can’t do anything right anymore. A stay-at-home-mum is being judged, because what does she do all day? A working mum is being judged because she neglects her children. And someone who chooses to be childfree is also judged because a woman who does not want to have children must be mental.
Instead of creating a support network, we women are just bitching at each other, comparing, winning imaginary competitions, etc.
It is great that feminists fought for freedom of choice for women. But what are we going to do with all these choices? Sometimes life is a lot easier and happy if you do not have to make any choices at all….
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I’m a newlywed with no children yet, but my husband and I are in full out planning mode about how to do find security and happiness in our individual and marital lives.  

It seems that we have set up a framework that just may become our parenting model.  Both of us want to work, hopefully both at home offices.  However, I am the one who works from home.  Our goal is to get my career, my path developed enough so that when children come I will know enough about my goals to be able to handle them and my work from  home.

My greatest fear is that I won’t have my path figured out enough before it becomes time to have children, and that I’ll be swallowed up in their needs before I know it.  

This is the “balance” we have now.
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